Outgrowing people



“You will outgrow people, people will outgrow you. This is life and, it’s ok”. – unknown

There comes a time in everyone’s life when things that you used to do, people you used to enjoy, things that you used to like…they just don’t interest you anymore.

There’s an old high school buddy of mine that always meets up with me when he’s in town. We always end up having long and sometimes deep convos on these meet ups. During our most recent encounter, we ended up speaking on one thing heavily.

Vibrating on a different level

Our conversations are always interesting, but the convo we had on this particular day, resonated with me.

I remember asking him about how a particular friend of his was doing and he basically told me that he didn’t know and that he wasn’t really concerned with the goings on of the people and things from our home town.

See, I’m from a very small city. I’m just going to be honest, most people never leave and there are many that never amount to anything. The mentality there is sickening. A lot of people can’t see the bigger picture BEYOND the city and there are a lot of “products of my environment” types. I don’t want to seem snooty, I’m just being honest. I worked hard in HS to get away because I saw the city for what it was. I graduated and left…briefly came back after graduating college for 9 months and left again. I didn’t look back and hopefully, I’ll never have to.

I thought it was a bit harsh what my classmate said, but then it started to make sense.

He moved on to another state. He’s successful and doing really well for himself. Why would he want to associate himself with people that have no hopes or dreams? People that are content with mooching off their parents and never having or earning anything of their own. People that only live to have the nicest outfit on Facebook and people that are practically MENTALLY still in high school after 8 years.

He was making plans to travel internationally and setting goals to increase his income, while those same people he used to associate with were making plans to play a video game tournament over someone’s mom’s house and making plans to see how many chicks they could bag at the club.

He was vibrating on another level…

When you’re vibrating on another level, you have to surround yourself with people who are vibrating at the same or higher frequency than you.

When you know better and have seen better, you DO BETTER.

Has your grandma ever said to you, “You better watch the company you keep”?

We don’t tend to listen to our elders, but we should…


Being surrounded by energy that isn’t positive, has a direct effect on your life.

I used to wonder why certain friendships didn’t work out and why certain relationships didn’t last. Sometimes you just simply outgrow people. I’ve tried to consistently hold on to people I’ve outgrown years ago!

But, I know now that it’s ok to Let go!

I remember visiting home during my time in college. There was a situation I experienced with a few classmates/old friends, that reminded me that I was vibrating differently. At the time, I just chalked it up to me being “boujee”…since that’s what everyone from my hometown says about me now days so, I just believed it. But, honestly it wasn’t me being “boujee”, I was just different. I was vibrating differently. I spoke better (not better as in better than anyone else but, better than I had before), I carried myself better, and I was better. Some of them were still stuck in a time warp.

I went a year or so without any friends because I didn’t really mesh well with anyone. Everyone was still stuck in high school and I’d already experienced and saw so much. I’d already lived on my own at 19…already experienced living in a hotel for a few days…just everything a person doesn’t see until late 20’s or early 30’s, I’d already seen and experienced.

Unbeknownst to me, I lost a really close friend a year or so ago. I’m really not sure why this particular person just suddenly ceased communication with me, but I had to realize that we had outgrown eachother as we’d continue having falling outs over things adults and real friends wouldn’t fight over.

Some people like to see you do good but, not better than them…

I’ve lost friends over catty high school things and more, but I know who ever is meant to be in my life will be.

When you think about it, it’s so hard trying to associate yourself with people that just aren’t at/on your level or even share similar interests.

I remember once I was hanging out with someone I considered a “friend”. Well somehow we got on politics and House of Cards and the election. I like talking to people who actually think…and idk if it was because I was causing this person to actually have to think or what, but they changed the topic. I even touched on the topic again to see if that’s what this person was doing and sure enough it was…my spiel about politics was interrupted with…Hey look at this meme!!

I’m cool with small talk., gossip too at times..but I love having actual meaningful conversations…The fact that through this entire encounter, I couldn’t have one single meaningful convo even aside from politics, made me realize something.

Vibrating on another level…

I remember back in college, I started hanging with this older chick. One day I was over her house…I’m not sure what was going on that day, but I was down and out…sad…depressed…you name it. We were actually getting ready to go somewhere when she politely asked me to leave. She said that my energy was negative and it was causing her to feel a certain way.

I was mad as hell! I mean, she told me to leave! I didn’t realize until I got older why she did that. My energy was bringing her down. You know the saying misery loves company….that’s it! By being surrounded by my negative energy, it was causing hers to change.

It’s kinda like this…. Say you’re in a room. The room has a natural floral scent. But someone comes in and starts spraying a bitter fragrance every 20 mins. The room’s scent has now changed from 100% floral to 80 % floral and 20% bitter. The more that bitter fragrance lingers…the higher the percentage will become until there’s only remnants of the floral scent.

Essentially, the more you’re surrounded by negative energy, the more it will pull you down.

The same goes with positive energy.

Ever been sad or upset and you walk into a room where everyone’s smiling, everyone’s happy, and everyone’s giving off good vibes…Doesn’t your mood change?

If you’ve had a pet then you’ll get what I’m saying. Whenever I was down, my dog was down too…because that was the energy I was giving off.

I’m not saying that anyone should think that they’re better than anyone else, I just feel as though you have to realize when you’re not on the same level mentally. Everyone won’t see the bigger picture because they’re still stuck in a box.

My mom told me that as a mature adult, sometimes you just have to let things go. Let people have themselves and don’t even respond. I’m learning to not be as argumentative and learning to be less childish and more humble.

Some things people say, I probably would’ve went back and forth with them in the past but now, I just let them have it because I don’t care! I’m too focused on bettering my life and everything in it to waste my breath speaking!

If your friends aren’t trying to amount to what you are or better or essentially do better for themselves…You’ve outgrown them!

If you’ve outgrown someone you probably should…let them go!

You can’t try to force a person to see the beauty in The Mona Lisa when they’ve never studied art or have an appreciation for it. It’s just a stupid picture to them…and you know why!?

Vibrating on another level!


One thought on “Outgrowing people

  1. borvest inkral says:

    I really like your writing style, superb info, regards for posting :D. “In university they don’t tell you that the greater part of the law is learning to tolerate fools.” by Doris Lessing.

    Liked by 1 person

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